I wish I owed millions and then I could get
The house of my dreams and my own private Jet
I’d head to the Hamptons where bankers are rife
And I’d ‘gift’ 20 million to the long suffering wife
If only I’d realised that I also should have ‘gifted’
The house to the kids before markets had shifted
My shame is my own if it ever gets out
I’ve long paid my mortgage I owe nobody nowt
Oh I wish I was bankrupt to ignore law and tort
And I’d stick up two fingers to every law Court
I’d bamboozle the Judge with my panache and my wit
But when it came to the facts I’d be telling him shit
Oh lay me in NAMA I’d respect all their rules
If I could get an allowance for the kid’s private schools
And of course a stipend to keep up to date
The fleet that we lovingly store by the gate
Oh and how I wish that I was liquidated
But the lads in the club tell me that I’d be hated
NDR is the new thing to sort out your debt
But conning those guys hasn’t come to me yet
